Monday 20 December 2010

20.12.10 Scandals

Allegedly . . .

Wagner is being investigated for claiming benefits while 'performing' on X-Factor.

One Direction - investigations centre on claims from some of the members for EMA whilst clearly not attending school for many weeks.  In an interview by government agents, information was forthcoming in a rather typical fashion: Liam started first, with an attempt at sincerity as he sang the first two lines.  Harry then joined in, adding a couple of supporting comments.  Then, the other three all said the exact same thing in out-of-tune tones, but added nothing to the plot.  They pleaded in unison, and then asked for permission to go outside to the playground with everyone else, after a group hug at the end of the submission.

Cheryl - investigations have revealed that her new 'Blood Group Diet' is useless, and on 15th December it was reported to be the "worst celeb food regime of the year" in the press. 

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