1st Place - "It's all right reading a normal book, but something that's academic is fucking horrible!" [Liam, after reading a book for university work for a few hours]
2nd Place - "If you find you haven't got enough, then you need a little bit more." [Amazing insight from Mike Robinson in Countrywise Kitchen, regarding the amount of meat needed to go round an egg to produce a Scotch Egg]
3rd Place - "There was just one bamboo shoot left when she flushed the chain." [Jess, regarding Emma being sick after a Chinese meal]
4th Place - "They're a former shadow of themselves." [Regarding Chelsea on Match of the Day; as ever, Alan, fantastically literate!]
5th Place - "You can put up with a wanker, but he's an absolute wanker." [Steve, regarding a mutual acquaintance]
6th Place - "He's on one of his skinny days today; one day he's this (+ physical imitation of being skinny) and the next he's out here." (+ physical imitation of being fat). [Adam, regarding the various forms adopted by Jimmy the canary]
7th Place - "You all danced incredible." [The oh so educated and prosaic Alesha Dixon on Strictly Come Dancing]
8th Place - "What are the chances of meeting in the toilet at quarter past two in the morning?" [A bleary-eyed Jess crossing paths with TMWSC]
9th Place - "What's that, a knee? Oh, I thought it might be a tin of something." [TMWSC to Mrs MWSC, while watching TV, suspecting the bump under the duvet was a tin of Quality Street]
10th Place - "I think that Chelsee's all a little bit to oooooooo." [Babs, regarding the words and actions of Chelsee on Strictly Come Dancing]
11th Place - "I think I've beaten my personal record - I've had them three times in a week." [Jess, ref chips]
12th Place - "She was going into a stage where she was depraved of oxygen." [Interview on Extras for the film Hereafter, with someone who meant 'deprived']
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