28.10.13 Joe Hart - Losing His Head & Shoulders

Is this Joe's best position?

I said a while back that Joe Hart was well short of being a great goalkeeper. Along with many keepers, he managers to fail in making judgements, and is woefully short of the ability to actually catch a ball!  For far too long, all keepers have been allowed to adopt the "pat it away" approach rather than the "catch the fucking ball" approach that was the mainstay of a keeper's armoury in decades gone by.  Being able to catch and hold the ball is a rather useful ability in a game where outfield players cannot do that.  The distinctiveness of the role would suggest someone in that role might seek to use all facilities open to them in stopping the opposition from scoring.  Alas, many keepers punch, pat, palm and piss about in preference to catching the ball.  To continue the 'p' alliteration, "positioning" is a vital element of goalkeeping, and this is one of the areas of concern for Joe Hart, as demonstrated so perfectly yesterday, when he decided to do everything in his power to fuck up (again) and he was successful.

I wonder if Procter & Gamble realised the gamble it was taking when it chose Joe to endorse Head & Shoulders in the UK.  I suspect that in believing Joe was 'head and shoulders' above the rest (in a metaphorical sense) the marketing people might have hoped he'd be that high when trying to clear a ball from a corner, in the goal mouth, though not that high when fucking up on the edge of his box.

Yet again there was a mix-up that was clearly Hart's fault, after he came out from the 6-yard box unnecessarily.  Worse, after allowing Torres to nip in and score, he seemed intent on swearing and not accepting the blame.  I am sure he's a nice guy if you know him, but based on the TV commercial, his general level of play in 2013, and the attitude he seems to display, I'd say that he's lucky to have his place in the Manchester City squad, let alone the England team.  I suggest that Roy Hodgson tries out some other keepers rather quickly, or the Brazil trip will be a short one.  Meanwhile, I suggest Joe considers a rather different strategy in the advertising world, perhaps with a move away from Head & Shoulders.  Perhaps he could help with an advert for Lemsip, as I'm sure he'd at least be able to catch a cold.

If he doesn't get better, he could become a model; he's had plenty of practice in showing off what could be his next goalkeeping strip, to confirm he's getting a reputation as a bit of a clown.

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