Twat
Sadly this excellent programme is ruined completely by Bruce Forsythe, and his pathetic contributions to light entertainment, TV, dance and planet fucking Earth. I did not include 'comedy' on purpose, as the bloke wouldn't recognise a good joke if it hit him in the face at 80 miles per hour!
He muttered, about his absence last week, that he hadn't been voted out, and that he'd had the flu. Does he not realise that 80% of the UK population was pleased, and the other 20% consisted of people who were too drunk to notice. Much funnier was the line from Abbey Clancy: "I'm from Liverpool." Hilarious, as if we needed help on that; in fact, the "I'm from" was enough for us to have filled in the blank.
Dave Myers was so horrendous that it was pantomime, and no doubt he will be saved despite scoring 16/40, the lowest by far on the night. The gurning and sneering was simply weird, more so than the hairstyle - well, the "hair existence/positioning". Bruno summed it up with: "The dance was beyond description."
What was more weird was Darcey's scoring, giving 5 points to Myers, yet Abbey only got 7. Myers was a '2', Darcey, so please stop being nice unnecessarily. Anton was funny with an aside, during the pointless exchange with Tess, after performing with Fiona Fullerton. He was referred to a 'Lothario' and he said: "Oh, I like that word; what does it mean?"
Len 'complemented' Rachel with reference to her "bionic bum" for some strange reason, whereas in my living room, I mentioned to Mrs MWSC that Mark Benton brought to mind the Fat Controller.
Bruce squeezed a joke through the eye of a needle which led to him saying 'Life' and then trying to sing: "Life, it's the name of the game . ." I cringed, and willed death to arrive for one of us, not caring who - him, but me if that's the way it turned out.
Darcey said of Deborah Meaden's dance that it was: "Fast and furious." In my mind, I heard Roy Walker continue with: " . . in the ready money round." What a catchphrase.
To summarise, then: Natalie Gumede was fucking awesome; the rest attended.
Results - Sunday
Bye, Vanessa.
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