1st Place - "I've had a mind blank; what's the black man with the nice voice called? [Jess, posing a rather vague question with potentially many thousands of answers, while trying to recall the name of what she soon after confirmed was an actor. NB: it was Morgan Freeman]
2nd Place - "You can only be a has-been if you once-were, but Sinitta never-was!" [TMWSC, regarding the utterly useless and pointless Sinitta]
3rd Place - "We can probably talk about things a little more bluntly now. A year ago you were depressingly depressed; now, you're aggressively depressed." [Anthony, in conversation with TMWSC]
4th Place - "Arghh! Someone just knifed me in the back of the head!" [Liam, playing Call of Duty]
5th Place - "These people who leave soaps - do they not know The Bill is not running anymore?" [Faye, after hearing about the latest actor to leave a long-running soap and hope to get work in the great wide world]
6th Place - "Don't walk through it, you fat tub of fuck all." [Liam, seeing Boo (Basset Hound) walking through her own wee on the lino floor]
7th Place - "That's downhill with the wind behind her, and farting as well!" [TMWSC, ref an old biddie doing about 15mph on a Motability scooter, travelling on the pavement]
8th Place - "When you're out and about, a cup of tea's disappointing. [Liam]
9th Place - "I lost three coats last week." [Emma, the world's most accomplished person for leaving things behind]
10th Place - "The weather's looking pretty quiet at the moment." [Martyn Davies on ITV, including noise levels now in weather forecasts]
11th Place - "Party like a celeb with Iceland." [TV advert, suggesting that celebrities would bother to shop at Iceland for party food!]
12th Place - "We haven't had a well-trained dog since Moses was a boy." [TMWSC, to Junior, regarding the non-compliance of a pet]
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