On 4th September, I recorded on this blog site the outrageous rise in the cost of Pasta at Morrisons. The 500g basic Pasta Twists had been put up from 17p to 41p overnight. In November, they were back down to 18p, inexplicably. Today, they are at 41p again. Whatever the fuck is going on at Morrisons, it's clear that there are games going on whereby consumers have the piss taken out of them.
I have not got, in my fridge, a large pork pie. I realise this statement is odd without further explanation being given, especially as it's possible to mention an infinite number of items that are not in one's fridge. The pie, though, was something I had intended to have in stock, and ready for the weekend. Alas, I was denied the opportunity to purchase one. I could have shown more tenacity, but dismissed the pie from my mind earlier today; only now has it crept back, as I think of Morrisons. I was set on reaching for a large pie, but was prevented from doing so by a fat fucker who positioned herself and her trolley such that I had no access to the shelves. I could of course have kicked her in the cunt, flooring her so I could make progress, but I considered that a risky strategy. She was clearly an advocate of the pie herself, because she must have eaten very many. As a result, I suspected she'd be a crumpled, immovable heap, and I would not be able to get close enough to the shelves. My annoyance was already high because it was the same woman I had just 'negotiated' to get some smoked salmon, at the fish section just beforehand. On that occasion, I was able to show minor patience and make my play before my right foot struck.
Leaving Morrisons was a struggle as well, mainly on account of Maud. I doubt that's her real name, because it's a complete guess, and I never got on talking terms with her. As I was leaving, I was blocked by a severe hold up, directly caused by Maud. She was (and still is, assuming her heating hasn't packed up and she's not died of hypothermia or had any accidents) a woman of perhaps sixty-five to seventy years, who acted like she'd just landed on Mars, or unexpectedly walked through the smoke on Stars In Their Eyes, to the voiceover of "Tonight, Maud, you're going to be Ertha Kitt". She simply slowed to the speed of an ant in the doorway, causing a blockage that meant gridlock. Morrisons has more old people for customers than any other supermarket.
Before I depart, there are other supermarkets at which you can shop: for balance I should mention -
Sainsbury's: nappy sacks (basic range) up from 9p to 16p, so there's clearly some shit going down if a 77% rise is necessary. Either that, of they are thieving cunts. Anyway, I'm not going to Sainsbury's now, after 'Glovegate' the other day.
Asda: shower gel up (basic range) up from 8p to 36p. Why a 350% price increase is necessary is beyond me, unless the 'thieving cunts' description applies. "Roll Back" my fucking arse! It was also the case, on my last visit there that the stock availability of the Carlsberg was strangely imbalanced. The boxes of 20 cans at £10 were not readily visible; then I saw them on the top shelf, all four of them. I am tall enough to reach the top shelf, and to reach far back enough to get three of them without issue. It is quite clear to me that the 4 items in an out-of-the-way place were hidden on purpose. Meanwhile, on the floor, there was a fuck-off great pallet of boxes containing 12 cans, and a big 'offer' sign stating £7. Hmmmm - 50p per can but we're not going to sell you that, or, 58.3p per can and you can take what you want, there's loads of it. The sixty cans cost me £30 rather than £35. Asda also decided to overcharge 84p on a gammon joint; never trust the tills to be 'in-sync' with the shelf prices. (They will refund x2 on my next visit.)
Tesco: they're just shit.
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