Tuesday 4 June 2013

4.6.13 Talking Shit

Affected Speech / Pronunciation

I am sick of twats trying to make a point when saying words they deem 'special' in some way, which require extra consideration when being spouted. Some examples to illustrate this point are as follows:

Avalanche, Homage, Provenance, Art Nouveau

These are all standard words and terms in the English language, whatever their derivation, so cunts who insist on needlessly mispronouncing them need shooting.  Averlonsh, Omarje, Provenonse, Ahh Noov-O is all bollocks, and then some!

Pronunciation Fuck-Ups

Can we all simply agree that there is room enough in the world for the inclusion of syllables which were intended when the cunts who devise words included letters (and associated syllables) in them!  So, without repeating any rants in previous posts, things such as "Reguly" instead of "Regularly" and "Itinery" instead of "Itinerary".  By the way, "Via" is pronounced the same way as it is in the first part of "Viaduct", and NOT as "Vee-a".

Missing Letters in Speech

Some of the shit spoken these days is a result of dropped letters, even if a syllable is not deleted.  "Reconise" for "Recognise", and "Artic" for "Arctic". Then we have the word "Vulnerable" which twats insist on pronouncing as "Vunrable".  There is a bone in the arm called the 'Ulna' and this should give a fucking clue as to how to pronounce "Vulnerable".  You don't here many doctors and nurses talking about a broken "Unner"

Plurals

The plural of "Wind Turbine" is NOT "Wind Turbine" you thick cunt on the telly! Wildlife is also a common target for using the singular to count as plural, so - the Giraffe are, the eel are, the Zebra are, the Turtle are, the Flamingo are.  If "Flamingo" is a plural term, then maybe we ought to write it as "Flamingeaux", and if anyone was stupid enough to do so, the Eskimeaux would get pissed off, I dare say.

Made-up Words

There are hundreds of them, many emanating from the USA, where they talk about "deplaning".  This is not the eradication of planes from the area, and it's not a term to explain making something rough again, to counter the effects of something being planed.  No, it's used for people who are in fact leaving an aeroplane [airplane in the USA of course] along with the equally fucked-up expression of "debarking" which, you've guessed it, is NOT removing the vocal chords from a rottweiler but is used also mean the opposite of "embark".

Stress

If you confirm, you are a conformist.  It's that fucking simple.  You are NOT a Con-f-mist.  Islam naturally leads to a description of Islamist with a long 'a'. How we go from Islam with a long 'a' to Islamic with a short stressed 'a' to Islamist with a short stressed 'I' is beyond me completely.

Nouns as Verbs

During the Olympics last year, there was a lot of Medal-ing (as opposed to "Meddling") because this provided a good example of the stupid practice of using a noun to create an associated (fictitious) verb.  We now get people who have "Podiumed" and climbers who have "Summitted".  What next, then?  How about animals who've "Abattoired" (not that they'll be around to discuss is - and if they were, they can't talk!) or people who win might be described as having "Trophied".  What complete fucking shite.  In fact the cunts who create this shit lingo might be said to have "Cunted", eh?

American States - Including Yoming

If Americans love to pronounce the first letter of words (especially vowels) as a long sound, to mimic the name of the letter - such as in Iowa, Idaho, Utah, and they 'export' this approach to places like 'Iran', 'Iraq', the 'Azores' and 'Oman', just why is there a 'W' in Wyoming?

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