1 - "I have two shits a day whether I need them or not." [Ray S]
2 - "I can't wear a dress with bare sleeves." [Debs]
3 - "Don't ever underestimate the power of a good handbag." [Jess]
4 - "I'm on the edge of normal." [TMWSC, referring to his weight and BMI rather than mental state]
5 - "In the second half, England had much the cuter possession." [Andy Townsend]
6 - "Menston has its own poo laws. I remember when I was younger I saw a human poo near my bins." [Ali E]
7 - "Catholics drag out everything." [Ant R, referring to ceremonies and rituals]
8 - "Snooker's John Virgo is among the line-up of Pointless Celebrities next on BBC1." [Announcer]
9 - "It's sometimes never the easiest thing." [Andy Townsend, expressing confusion]
10 - "I'm much more conscientious of cycling." [ Banter on Radio 2 - Steve Wright Show]
11 - "Deek burns at night!" [Chris D, after checks whether Deek had applied factor 50 as protection]
12 - "To the lowlife scum who stole my bike from albert park on Thursday; hope you get aids, ghonoreah and syphilis and ya cock falls off!!!!! horrible cunt." [Exact extract from 'Spotted: Middlesbrough']
13 - "All this air from up in the north - the cold direction." [Lisa, on 'Look North' weather]
14 - "If they can find a goal it will just change the entire temperature of the night." [Commentator during Chelsea v Benfica, talking shite]
15 - "Come on, don't be embarrassed." [One of the stupid women on Embarrassing Bodies]
16 - "Foraged in Norfolk." [Stupid term on Masterchef. What next - "Groped in Kent" then?]
17 - "As this area of low pressure catherine wheels its way in." [Twat on TV giving weather forecast ]
18 - "Deliver a precise and exact attack." [Air Vice Marshall Atha talking bollocks ref the Dambusters]
19 - "West Ham are doing our bit for the future." [Karen Brady, screwing up the grammar]
20 - "Heading northbound." [Sally on Radio 2. Heading North OR Northbound, luv]
21 - "Showers have been twirling, but later we should get some warm sunshine." [Lucy Versamy]
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