2nd Place - "How do you cut your eyelashes, cos they're close to your eyes, aren't they?" [Faye]
3rd Place - "You can't imagine him going to the doctor or doing anything normal, can you?" [Jess, regarding the unusual Will.i.am]
4th Place - "My grandmother's mother was originally Scottish." [A comment from Antiques Road Trip]
5th Place - "I'm in a shit car with skinny wheels and no oomph - I've no business harassing a Volvo!" [TMWSC, getting irate with the exceedingly slow and erratically driven car in front]
6th Place - "Glastonbury has a cauldron of different diversities." [Radio interview, regarding the supposed 140 religions in the area]
7th Place - "I don't think I could even bounce a ball against a wall and catch it with one hand." [Jess, after watching The Cube and assessing her own skill level]
8th Place - "He was 33 centimetres; that's just like a 30cm ruler." [Faye, ref Charlie when he was born]
9th Place - "Clearly taking your hands off the wheel while driving creates unnecessary risk and increases the possibility of accidents. We advise all drivers to pay attention to what is going on around them at all times." [RAC spokesman, stating the fucking obvious, or what!]
10th Place - "I hate those wire things; they go straight through me." [Jess, on why she doesn't remove the tea stains from her cup with a Brillo pad]
11th Place - "Some cunt of a chump has to get involved when he's got fuck all to do with it. [TMWSC on a typical rant]
12th Place - "There could be torrential heavy downpours tonight." [ITV local weather report; as if there could be a torrential light downpour! Also, "could be" is not much of a fucking prediction!]
13th Place - "Men do have camels like bladders." [Faye]
14th Place - "The spotlight was shined on a troubled part of the world." [Dan Roan, on BBC1 News]
15th Place - "That zit is bigger than anything I've seen this side of 1987." [TMWSC ref Harvey's 'friend']
16th Place - "I want you to show us who you are as a human being." [A preposterous comment from Oliver Peyton, a judge on Great British Menu, displaying a ludicrous appreciation of what he should be doing - the chef cooks fucking food and doesn't need to reveal his politics, religion, inner thoughts or DNA!]
17th Place - "Now you can unmiss your favourite shows." [Said in an advert for 4oD]
18th Place - "I'm not sure what that did to the fractions in the dressing room." [Lee Dixon, who meant 'factions']
19th Place - "So, Will.i.am's gut is female then!" [TMWSC, watching The Voice]
20th Place - "When my gut talks to me, I listen to her." [Will.i.am talking shit on The Voice]
21st Place - "It's a whole nother Avengers." [Mark Ruffalo talking non-English to Graham Norton]
22nd Place - "Very wet for some." [Lunchtime weather forecast, 26.4.12 and not particularly helpful]
23rd Place - "Airwick Refills sponsor ITV Afternoons." [Clever things, these refills. This news came at 6.45pm on a Saturday - not good at timing though, are they!]
24th Place - "It's not the most important thing, but it's intragal to who I am." [Woman's Hour on Radio 4, and the guest meant integral, of course]
25th Place - "There's been a lot of blood, sweat and tears in the kitchen this week." [A judge on Great British Menu, giving a very worrying picture of things; I certainly don't want blood, sweat or tears in any kitchen if it's where my food is being prepared!]
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