1.3.12 February Quotes of the Month

1st Place - "I just get behind her and give her everything I've got."  [Daniel Whiston, on Dancing On Ice, talking about Jennifer Ellison]

2nd Place - "It looks like a snatch that's gone punk."  [TMWSC, ref Kevin Prince-Boateng's haircut]

3rd Place - "He makes bread sound like liquid."  [Liam, regarding Harvey's eating of a sandwich in the noisiest way possible]

4th Place - "She's a victim of her own flexibility."  [Rosemary Conley, regarding Jennifer Ellison, who cut her head with her own ice skate]

5th Place - "Dead people will be kept on artificial ventilators."  [Channel 5 news reporter]

6th Place - "You're not going to grow your beard till it's touching your food, are you?"  [Jess, to TMWSC]

7th Place - "He really is a Mr Muscles; I bet he could clear out a few drains."  [Tony Gubba, regarding Sebastien on Dancing On Ice]

8th Place - "I know there was one or two question marks asked."  [Alan Shearer]

9th Place - "At least he skates better than George drives."  [Tony Gubba, referring to Sam who was dressed as George Michael, on Dancing On Ice]

10th Place - "You wouldn't see me wearing camouflage."  [TMWSC]

11th Place - "I can sell shit to the arabs."  [Quote from a doorman who was boasting about his skills on the Channel 4 programme Bouncers]

12th Place - "He looks like he's just come out of a pond."  [TMWSC ref David Moyes looking rather goggle-eyed in an interview on Match of the Day]

13th Place - "Ligging is lazy lurking."  [Mrs MWSC, explaining the difference to TMWSC]

14th Place - "Help! Help! Post Office vehicle under attack; please call the police."  [Alert sounding from a van parked next to the post office, with the driver sitting in the front seat on a mobile - no one was paying any heed to the very loud alert/alarm at all]

15th Place - "There are just too many post mortems - I think it's overkill."  [TMWSC]

16th Place - "It fell to her former ex-husband, Bobby Brown, to . . . . . . "  [TV Newscaster]

17th Place - "I can't say his name, but I don't give a shit!  Get innnnn."  [Jess, by text, ref Jutkiewicz scoring for Boro against Sunderland]

18th Place - "Once the thought's in your head, you're not eating with confidence, are you?  [TMWSC, ref the problem with carrying on with the cooking of a chicken that smells a bit suspect, and why it's necessary to chuck it]

19th Place - "Can I interest you in any of our eggs; two for a pound?  [Shell petrol station worker trying to upsell on autopilot to TMWSC]

20th Place - "All right then, okay then, right-o then."  [Said in one burst by a woman on a mobile phone in the street]

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