Just when you thought that X-Factor cannot get any more boring, Movie Night arrived to wipe away any such notion. Yes, the remaining hopefuls were expected to relay some warbling that has featured in a film - a task that was rather challenging for some. I found myself agreeing with Simon Cowell on just one point during the Saturday night show - that 'Who Let the Dogs Out?' (from 'Rug Rats In Paris') was stretching credibility more than the elastic on Gemma Collins' bikini bottoms.
Cheryl Tweedy Versace Coal from Newcastle was particularly Geordie, mixed with twattish, after her "full props to you" declaration to one of the contestants - Monica, I think. Olly Murs struggled equally with the English language, though from a more southern perspective of course. Cowell grinned and acted like a pompous wazzock. At the end of the table, Nick Grimmace was rather shiny; it seems someone in make-up had buffed him up a treat, leaving a plastic coating on his face, or so it seemed. Then there was Rita, who really did look like she had consumed Ritalin an hour before the show. She was strangely dopey but was then prone to weird outbursts during the course of the show, talking complete rubbish.
Make Some Noise
He would have been better if he'd not made any at all
Louisa Johnson
A decent shot at the title if she keeps focused
Monica Michaels
Dreadful wailing, after last week's horrendous racket
4th Impact
Simply fucking terrible; the cacophony was ludicrously shite
Max Stone
The squinting, bland bloke was dreadfully forgetable
Anton Stephans
He sang okay, but hardly inspiring or entertaining
Veggie 'N' Bollox
These two chancers are nice chaps who have no business whatsoever being in the finals
Lauren
Average when singing, nauseating when speaking - which is all the fucking time!
Che Chesterman
Yes, point favourite, but what a boring fucking song that we've all heard 5341 times
The drama of a the collapse of a 4th Impact singer was only surpassed by the drama of a new-look Caroline Flack, with blonde hair. She retained the same voice that could shatter crockery at a thousand paces, of course. I felt minimal sympathy for the one who fainted, and felt nothing at all in respect of the blonde hair.
This show was, without doubt, an awful excuse for entertainment, and X-Factor may well find its days are numbered. When will the organisers wake up and realise that eager hopefuls 'having fun' and telling us they don't want it to end is NOT a basis to take up so much time in the TV schedules? Wally Murs adds nothing to the show at all, and need not be standing next to Flack. In turn, Flack represents no real change in approach from the original host, Kate Thornton, who was in our faces and shrieking for England every few minutes.
So who is going home this weekend? Obviously Veggie 'N' Bollox ought to be ejected, based on talent, although I find myself not really giving a damn.
Ejected
Max Stone and Monica Michaels - Hurrah !
...
No comments:
Post a Comment