Did anyone know it was 'Chip Week' from 20th February until today? I must confess that the existence of Chip Week was unknown to me until I saw in Friday's newspaper ['Fryday' as it was referred to by the Sun] along with an offer of, and I quote, "Free Chips for Every Reader".
Actually, this was a gross misrepresentation of the offer, as a quick look at the terms and conditions revealed. Apparently, the offer was available to UK residents aged 16+. Now, in my opinion that does not at all include every reader. This is quite clearly bollocks on various counts:
1 - Are we supposed to believe that there are weird legal reasons for the offer of a free bag of chips being available only to those aged 16 and over? What possible issue could there be in allowing younger readers to benefit?
2 - Considering the reading age of the Sun is in fact no more than 14, it is baffling why everyone who reads the comic is adopting a 14-year-old's abilities and outlook, but is then denied chips for their efforts. Surely this gives rather more reason to give readers a taste of what a typical 14-year-old might like to eat - some chips.
3 - There is further gross misrepresentation, as the offer is completely flawed. A free bag for every reader is not at all the offer. In fact, the availability of free chips, aside from the age restriction, is limited to purchasers/owners of newspapers who retain all rights to it and decide to remove the coupon in order to present it at the chip shop. A 'subsequent reader' of the comic would see a space in the paper on page 29 where the coupon once was. With the terms and conditions clearly barring all photocopies, the only way to get chips means owning a copy of the paper; reading it is simply not enough to qualify, whatever the claims made by the heading.
4 - Are we to assume that chip shops (participating ones, at least, but more of that in a moment) will be contesting their obligations to offer a free bag of chips in exchange for a coupon? I am certain that with the offer being available to those aged 16+, there will be instances where refusals to serve have come about through lack of ID. It is a sad cuntin' day when to get some chips, a youthful (or youthful looking) person has to carry ID for potatoes! What is the policy, though, at chip shop level? Does a check of age come about for all those who don't look 25? This is the general rule for other so-called 'restricted' items. If one has to be 16 to buy a lottery tickets, then I suppose there's some parity between the two transactions and requirements, but gambling is a bit more serious than chip-eating, surely? I have seen the 'gamble-aware' website being promoted a lot, but I've not yet seen http://www.chipaware.co.uk/
5 - The portion of chips available (if indeed one is made available) is classed as "small". I have no idea what that is, not least because every cunt in the catering industry does not recognise such a size, albeit this size most definitely should be recognised. No, the once perfectly acceptable denominations of small, medium and large have been superseded (or should that be supersized?) so that we now have to operate within environments that provide stuff in formats and quantities under the headings of regular, medium, large, extra large and super size. So just how many chips would one (small) coupon qualify the bearer for, if he/she were over 16, living in the UK (but not Northern Ireland??) and standing in a participating chip shop, making sure that the coupon was not in any way defaced, amended, altered or damaged? I have less idea on the answer to that than I have an idea on the difference between 'altered' and 'amended', as declared in the terms and conditions, regarding the state of any coupon.
6 - The coupon has on it "Free Bag of Chips". I therefore see little point in the terms and conditions stating that the coupon cannot be used against beverages or any other food available.
So, there you have it, a pretty flawed offer. I had no inclination to go on to the stated website to check on which chip shops in the area might be 'participating'. In my neck of the woods, retailers would not engage with technology. The terms state that chip shops can refuse entry or service at their sole discretion [the pun was probably not even recognised by the person drawing up the conditions, let alone intended]. In this area, even a shop participating is likely to suit itself and tell you to piss off rather than serve you.
In summary, I did not cut out the coupon, and was puzzled as to why it appeared in the paper on Friday, denying those who might be keen to eat chips earlier in the week. It's not as if there's a mad rush for chips on a Friday only, and I suspect some twat got muddled up with the demands placed on the industry by the three-dozen remaining Catholics in the UK (excluding Northern Ireland) who still eat fish on Fridays, though who knows how many chips may or may not accompany a portion of sole. It is now Sunday and just passing the 3.00pm mark. The coupon runs out today, and I feel I have perhaps overlooked an opportunity to hand my unused (undefaced, unaltered, unamended, undamaged and original) coupon to a Sun reader who may not have owned the paper, and found the coupon missing in his/her borrowed copy of the paper. Oh well.
I will mention just one more thing - the introduction which rather 'talks up' the whole thing.
Tuck in to some FREE chips courtesy of The Sun. To celebrate Chip Week (February 20-26) we are offering readers a portion of the nation's favourite potato preparation. For your mouth-watering bag of chips, cut out the voucher on the right and take it to your nearest participating chippy.
It seems as if I should have included a point number seven above, as I had no idea that the coupon was to be presented to my nearest chippy. I will now have to consider whether those wanting chips ought to have three utility bills with them to confirm residence and allow the chip shop owner to check on Google Earth whether his or her establishment can be classified as the 'nearest' and thus avoid abuse of the offer. As for the blurb itself, "favourite potato preparation" ??? !!! Ha!
...
No comments:
Post a Comment