Sunday, 20 November 2011

20.11.11 Match of the Day Phrases

I am so fucking fed up with the stupid bandwagons that that people jump on, with regard to phrases [see how I got my cliche in first!]

There was a time when a team could lose (or win) four matches "in a row".  However, the in phrase on MOTD is now "on the bounce".  What the fuck?

Footballers used to play the "one-two".  Nowadays, you'll hear the phrase "He played a little give and go".

There are the painful uses of the following:

The last third [as if football pitches are divided into three?]
He had his pocket picked [meaning he was tackled by an opponent]
Strength in depth [fucking Alan Hansen's favourite dollop of verbal shit]

Now we have the ubiquitous "Stonewall penalty".  What a complete load of bollocks.  Cuntin' crap!

As for Alan Hansen, why oh why is my TV licence fee contributing to his £40,000 per week salary?  All he does is sit on a fucking sofa, mumbling that it was a stonewall penalty, and that although there was strength in depth, there was little to talk about in the last third.  I would rather have the money donated to charity than have to suffer the smug comments from the action man with a plastic face.  Go and advertise Morrisons, and push a trolley, why don't you!

Shearer, stop breathing - please!

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