Saturday, 3 June 2017
3.6 17 Horrendous Cunting English
Once again the pride must continue their search. [David Attenborough making a pride plural]
These zebra are almost at the end of their journey. [David at it again - 'zebra' is not plural!]
There were no mention of . . . [Tom Simons, BBC News]
What the enquiry say is . . . [Sanchia Berg, Radio 4]
Spectaculy. [Radio 4 idiot reporter, missing a syllable and a brain]
But have Russia done enough? [Garry Richardson on Radio 4]
Sins Fein is celebrating their best performance . . . [Kate Silverton talking shit]
It finds its way into all sorts of arena. [Unknown idiot - pathetic news reporting, making 'arena' plural]
The selection criteria was very hard. [Vicky Holland on Radio 4]
There is really quite good chances. [Vicky Holland again]
To go through these sequence of questions. [Sarah Montague on Radio 4]
Sofits and Facias. [Rick Woodall Building Services Ltd van livery; he is unable to spell either word]
They have one of Hollywood's most longest marriages . . . . the couple have almost been married for 30 years. [Daily Mail Online, with a double error; should be "have been married for almost 30 years"]
It hasn't sunken in yet. [Tanya on The Voice]
It looks like the team are about to start their warm up. [Screw Fix advert]
It's a pictoral journey. [Idiot on Radio 4]
A bunch of 27 flowers were taken to a nearby care home. [Daily Mail]
Every one of the 100 senators were called in. [Nick Robinson on Radio 4]
And finally, the decline of the adverb is sadly relentless, as twats completely misuse the language with in most cases not a fucking shred of awareness. We have, for example:
"Living healthier"
Living healthier what? Lives? Yes, that would make sense and be grammatically correct. However, the cunt on TV narrating the advert meant "Living healthily" or "Living more healthily". I despair.
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