8.1.17 Let It Shine

Saturday night television has hit a new low.  It was looking bad enough after ITV bought The Voice UK and we were all set to be served the usual painful shit but with numerous annoying adverts as well.  I resolved that I'd not be wasting any energy on this damp squib of a show, and the gurning judges who would annoy us all much more than the contestants and their deluded families. I had not counted on BBC1 coming in with a more nausea-inducing load of shite than I could have imagined.

Let It Shine?  Dull As Fuck!

I find myself commenting now without having actually watched the rubbish. This is, in my opinion, the very best move I could have made; why?  Let's look at the evidence.  Aside from the pathetically boring trailers aired by the BBC in recent weeks, I had little specific knowledge of the show, until I read the brief feature in my TV guide yesterday morning.  I will use the details to relay my thoughts.

The concept is of course weaker than an holistic remedy.  Let me quote the premise as detailed by Elaine Penn in TV Choice.

The BBC may have lost The Voice but they're [sic] pinning all their [sic] hopes on Let It Shine, a new talent show aiming to find five individuals to create a pop group for Gary Barlow, Mark Owen and Howard Donald's new stage show featuring the songs of Take That.

Really?  Just how cunting boring a search could someone dream up?  Nothing as awful as this one, for sure.  A talent show to find members of a boy band to regurgitate on stage the warblings of Barlow & Co.  Dire indeed!  What is this weird obsession with fucking stage shows and musicals?

The musical is called The Band, and we want them to have all the youthfulness and energy we had when we started in 1990.  Seeing young people on a stage is exciting," says Gary, 45.

By this stage I had already resolved to go nowhere near the farcical effort. "Seeing young people on stage is exciting" (said Thomas The Tank Engine) and I heard Barlow uttering this in my head. Learning that Mel Giedroyc was involved was further motivation to miss it.  As for a show called The Band, I have no need, thank you.

So what kind of person impresses Gary?  "personality is massive.  When they come on, the spark has to be turned on and people have to be entertained."

How dare he say "personality is massive" when he has none of his own.

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