The football season is underway, and so it's open season for the twats who have no command or understanding of the English language, or even the slightest awareness of grammar. On Match of the Day, Alan Shearer is, as ever, harping on like a nob with his "asking questions of" theme, as though every man in a shirt is a quiz master. To kick off the season, we've just had these:
We wanted to galvanize each other together. [Mike Phelan]
You get the ball in and around him. [Ian Wright]
It's gonna be a long, hard season. [Yawn . . . Shearer]
In case you're in need of further evidence, perhaps it is time to review the last 12 months. It must be time to reflect on the complete bollocks that's talked by the presenters, pundits and commentators. There is no end in sight regarding the relentless crap that leaves mouths, while pay levels for the culprits seem inversely proportional to linguistic prowess. A basic level of English is not even a requisite, let alone an ability to think about what's being said, content-wise. The inanity of the exchanges confirms we would all be better off having no 'expert' opinion included in any TV programme. For those who seem to talk about quality, and typically the lack of a little bit most commonly in the 'final third', the idiots are somehow oblivious to their own complete lack of quality. As for grammar, words fail me. Here is a sample of what I'm talking about.
Jermaine Jenas is clearly on a mission to beat Alan Shearer to the top spot, with his utter drivel, all delivered under the guise of trying to seem intelligent.
Q: What are they missing? [Gary Lineker]
A: A little bit of quality in the final third. [Danny Murphy]
There was some heroic performances. [Danny Murphy]
I expect a good new few additions next season. [Danny Murphy]
He should not be getting beat. [Jermaine Jenas]
They was overran at times. [Jermaine Jenas]
He was kept getting into these positions. [Jermaine Jenas]
We're gonna try and clamp this out completely. [A Shearer classic]
The most unlikeliest of goal scorers. [MOTD commentator]
They couldn't be any closer separated. [Elidh Barbour]
Question marks about the Chelsea defence. [Jonathan Pearce]
Once again, question marks in that Bournemouth defence. [Jonathan Pearce]
I'm gonna minimalise the risk. [Jermaine Jenas]
Gary's not somebody who goes down unless he's got a problem. [Danny Murphy]
Look at the amount of numbers they've got. [Jermaine Jenas]
He has to real concentrate on that one. [Jermaine Jenas]
Swansea played a real good part. [Jermaine Jenas]
They haven't really exerted themself. [Andy Townsend bollocks]
There's a little bit too much reliant on Sergio Aguero. [Trevor Sinclair]
Like any good striker, he's in the office. [Trevor Sinclair]
They put in 4, 5, 6 passes, and kept the ball patient. [Glenn Hoddle]
He's got goals in him; he can score goals. [Andy Townsend]
He likes to drag people in and around the ball. [The wanker maestro, Andy Townsend again]
When you're playing all the others in and around him. [Change the record, Andy Townsend!]
It didn't have the support in and around him, did it? [Shut up, Townsend!]
They've got to get someone in and around him. [Another Alan Shearer classic]
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