Pummelled By The Bumper of a Runaway Qashqai ?
For some time we have had to suffer the advice offered by the overhead gantries on motorways, with the orange dots forming such pearls of wisdom as:
Tiredness Kills - Take a Break
Check Your Fuel Level
Drive Safely
Watch Your Speed
Check Your Tyre Pressure
Don't Crash
Okay, I made up the last one, but generally the stating of the obvious seems to be mandatory for these signs. More annoying, though, is the trend for a slightly different approach, as displayed on the hard shoulder by alerts which have no doubt been dreamed up by some sort of advertising consultancy on behalf of the Highways Department. This has lead to us now having a new source of disgruntlement while driving at a ludicrous 50mph while no cunt does a shred of work on the coned-off area of the motorway. Over and above the "Stay Alert, Stay Alive" advice, we now have:
Let's all get home safely
Someone loves you, drive with care
No one likes a tailgater
Fuck right off with this shit! I reckon these were possibly suggested by the peacemaker at the local pub who's first to say: "Come on now, we've all had a drink, let's calm down". Arguably worse are the small advertising boards displaying a kid, alongside the message: "My dad works here".
This approach will clearly dissuade any lunatic driver from intentionally mowing down a random chap in a hard hat, and simultaneously orphaning the kid. Yeah, right. As for safety, putting up signs with pictures means a driver's attention is drawn away from the road even more!
Perhaps the very best course of action that could be taken by the government to improve attention would be to make it illegal to display without approval the signs that now litter green fields. The loophole (because the signs are not permanent) means any journey I make via a motorway allows me now to consider purchases from ebuyer, victorian bathrooms, and a host of other web-based retailers for diverse products; glasses, insurance, beds, cars, electrical goods and 20% of what is contained within the latest Argos cunting catalogue!
When I drive, I want to be allowed to do so without some cunt of a nanny working for the state, who thinks I do not know what's good for me, and thus feels the need to prompt me to think, slow down, check oil, fuel, water and tiredness levels, as well as tyre pressure, whilst noting speed limits, average speed checks, blokes in hard hats who have kids at home hoping that their dads will not be pummelled by the bumper of a runaway Qashqai.
And finally . . . . . .
Unnecessary on ANY level !
...
No comments:
Post a Comment