It was the AA, of course, which decided to award itself the status of "4th Emergency Service" some years ago. The prevalence of the yellow vans and overall scale of its UK operation meant that the AA lent itself rather nicely to this perceived status. Many years have passed without any other organisation deciding to nab the next slot, and call itself the "5th Emergency Service". However, the time has come - and I am making my own proposal after recently seeing a high profile presence on our roads.
Which organisation should be given 5th spot? No, not the RAC. No, not Autoglass. Instead, I'm suggesting:
Dogs Trust
I was recently at a Little Chef, and was rather surprised to see two vans pull up. They were very new, and sign-written with DogsTrust / dogstrust.org.uk in the familiar yellow, with the logo (dog's head). Now, I've no wish to upset animal lovers, but what the fuck! The supposed charity is now much like most other large and successful charities, in that its first concern now seems to be looking after itself and employees. A fleet of vans and drivers (who have their 'Little Chef' lunches paid for) is apparently the latest step in the expansion and domination of this charity. So, if you're tempted to help a dog, maybe it would be worth knowing first just how much of your £5 per month actually goes to 'Harvey' or 'Greyfriars Bobby'. I suspect that after paying for vans, petrol, advertising, wages for 'directors' and other staff, plus 'fund-raisers', and anything else that can be taken out of donations, the real contribution to the good cause is likely to be £1 out of the £5 spent. There are just too many organisations that end up becoming businesses.
So, the new "5th Emergency Service" is provided by the Dogs Trust - helping animals everywhere - especially in Barking.
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